It all starts, again, with a story Ed has told many times.
And yet this edition makes a newer and more urgent case for Humble Inquiry, the gentle art of asking instead of telling.
We see humble inquiry as critical for two vital human pursuits — Building open and trusting “level 2” relationships and getting to the truth of what is really going on (content and context). We have made a lot of changes to Ed’s best-selling appeal to leave behind the “culture of tell”, and evolve toward a more open and attentive form of relating, managing and leading. Here are some excerpts:
From the Preface:
“We hope in this second edition to address the inevitability that as the world becomes more interlinked and multicultural, most of the time we do not know what is really going on or why this is happening now. We hope that the deeper and broader approach to Humble Inquiry presented here will help you to see around and through the brazen telling provided by others, and to deepen the skills to learn what really matters in the shared context of many conversations in many relationships that are woven into your social fabric, at work and at home.”
From Chapter 8:
“Humble Inquiry presumes continuous assessment of the situation, so asking oneself what else is happening may be an essential pre-condition for effective inquiry. We do not want to fall into the trap of not reflecting and then plowing in with a sequence of telling or leading questions that betray a lack of situational awareness. The tough boss who has always relied on telling may find, upon reflection, that he or she has the capacity and even the desire to try a different approach, such as going to a direct report and asking kindly, “What’s on your mind today? Tell me about it . . .” Rather than adding something more to do that day, such inquiry might actually take some pressure off the workday at hand.”
From the final section “Twelve Mini Case Studies…”:
“Humble Inquiry is an attitude that can and should show up in different kinds of situations. The most important aspect of the attitude is what we are calling situational awareness, assessing in every conversation what your purpose is and how it aligns to the situation at hand. You may just be exploring, having fun, or trying to convince someone of something; you may be trying to build a relationship or decipher what may really be going on if the situation is ambiguous or full of conflict. Everything you do next will be an intervention, even if you just stay in a silent observer mode, and will convey some aspect of your purpose to the other person in the conversation. It will help to learn to become mindful of the different consequences of what you say.
For each of the twelve situations that we describe below, ask yourself what you would say and make a note of it in the space provided. After you are done, read the several possible responses and how each relates to the concept of Humble Inquiry. You can then compare what you think you might have said to the various alternatives.
This is not a test and you don’t get a score. This is an opportunity to observe yourself in action and become more mindful of how you operate…
…6. Your fellow team members are becoming noticeably less engaged in weekly staff meetings, and you are not sure why. As a team member you are worried about this. You are at a meeting where the boss is not present.
What do you say or do?”
Our second edition of Humble Inquiry is for sale now from Amazon and other book retailers. As always, please feel free to let us know what you think!
